Loneliness in a crisis: what to do now

In a crisis, the phone rings less. Some people pull away because they don't know what to say, others for fear your pain is contagious. The loneliness that comes with the fall can hurt as much as the fall itself. It's real, and there is a way out. This page brings the practical steps; if you want the same pain told as a story, read the short story How to deal with loneliness.

What to do now

1. Ask for help specifically. "I'm not okay" scares people; "can you listen to me for half an hour on Saturday?" or "do you know anyone who's hiring?" is easy to answer. Concrete requests get concrete answers.
2. Reconnect with one person a week. An old friend, a relative, a former colleague. A simple message is enough. Relationships are rebuilt little by little.
3. Look for communities. Support groups, neighborhood associations, faith communities, entrepreneur groups, volunteer projects. Being among people with a shared goal eases the feeling of isolation.
4. Use the services that welcome people. Your city's CRAS knows about groups and community services. Primary health units (UBS) and psychosocial care centers (CAPS) provide care through SUS for people in emotional distress.
5. Help someone. It sounds contradictory, but helping another person is one of the fastest ways to break isolation. You feel useful and connected again.
6. Keep a minimum routine. Wake up at the same time, leave the house every day, even if only for a walk. Loneliness deepens in a shapeless day.
7. Know when it's urgent. If loneliness comes with thoughts that it would be better not to be alive, call CVV now at 188, free, 24 hours a day, or use the chat at cvv.org.br. In immediate danger, SAMU at 192.

When it happened to Bairo

Bairo Leandro Gonzalez Martinez says he knew the loneliness of the immigrant. In his first years in Brazil, without documents in hand, he lived, in his words, in the shadows of life, with no direction and no network, far from home.

Later, he knew another loneliness, that of someone who sees things first. When he wanted to bring artificial intelligence and augmented reality into the business, he was told it wouldn't work. Years later, the very same thing became a trend. Anyone who lives that up close knows that arriving too early also means arriving alone.

And there was the hardest loneliness: being left hanging by people he had helped. After it came six months alone at home, in front of the computer, building. Only then did he stop being alone: he found help and connection in three old acquaintances.

The path

The loneliness of a crisis is usually a season, not an address. In Bairo's story, it ended with the word "together": for someone who had been left hanging, going back to building as a team was a reconciliation with the idea of trusting. Open a door, even a small one. Someone on the other side may be waiting for it too.

If you live far from your family or have only recently arrived in your city, loneliness can run even deeper. Look for regular meeting places: the same square, the same community, the same group. Bonds are born of repetition, not of a single encounter. In a few months, familiar faces start to become names, and names start to become friends.

Read also

• The seventh attempt
• No one believes in me: what do I do?
• One name, four presences
• How to deal with loneliness (short story)